Dating in 2025 is Weird.
Whether you’re swiping, texting, or navigating a relationship, it rarely looks like what we expected. Between dating apps, ghosting, and endless “situationships,” connection today is more confusing than ever.
For many millennials and Gen z client I work with, it’s not just about finding love— it’s about managing the emotional toll dating brings up. Why do I feel anxious when they don’t text me bag? Am I being wild, or is this a red flag? Why does this feel so familiar…again?
In therapy, we’ll talk about how dating taps into deeper issues like attachment styles, self-worth, and emotional boundaries. If dating has you feeling frustrated, stuck, or like you’re repeating old patterns, you’re not alone—and there’s nothing wrong with you.
We’ll talk about how to unpack the challenges of modern dating, explore why it brings up so much emotional stuff, and talk about how tehrapy can help you feel more grounded (and less ghosted) in your relationships.
Why Modern Dating Feels soo Hard
Dating isn’t just swiping right or sending witty texts (that’s another challenge). But it’s managing your anxiety while wondering “Am I too much? Not enough?” or just caught up in another dead-end “talking” situation.
What makes dating today feel so exhausting is the combination of constant communication with minimal connection. You might match, chat for days, and never meet. Or, you’re deep in a thread and suddenly ghosted. These patterns can feel disorienting, especially if you’re trying to date intentionally.
And let’s not even with how difficult dating apps are for the queer community. For queer people, dating apps are often the main way to meet others—which makes rejection or lack of follow-through feel even more personal.
These emotional responses aren’t just about the person on the other side of the phone. They’re tied to you, your story, your attachment wounds, and how safe or anxious you feel in closeness.
From a Therapist’s Perspective—Dating Brings Up Your Past
Let me tell you—it’s never just about dating. It’s about what dating brings up.
In my work with clients, we explore how romantic relationships trigger old emotional patterns:
The fear of abandonment when someone pulls away
The never to over-explain or prove your worth in texts
The urge to seem “cool and chill” even when you’re spiraling inside
These reactions often trace back to attachment styles and learned behaviors from early relationships—whether it’s family struggles or past partners. An avoidant partner might remind you of a parent who wasn’t emotionally available. Feeling anxious when someone doesn’t text back may link to a deeper fear of rejection.
Strategies for Navigating Dating with More Clarity
You can’t control who texts back, but you can get clearer on how you show up in dating—and how you care for your emotional needs. Here are a few strategies I often explore with clients:
Notice the pattern, not just the person. Are you dating someone new, or re-experiencing something old in a new form?
Name your needs. Practice getting clear on what you want emotionally, not just logistically.
Regulate before you react. When anxiety spikes, try grounding practices before texting back or spiraling into assumptions.
Create a pause. Just becaues someone texts back doesn’t mean you owe instant emotional labor in return.
Stay aligned. Ask: does this interaction reflect the kind of relationship I’m looking for?
Dating can stir up a lot, especially if you’re trying to do the inner work alongside finding connection. If you’re feeling confused, reactive, or just tired of the emotional rollercoaster, therapy can help you come back to yourself.
You don’t have to keep repeating the same patterns or questioning your worth after every unread message. Therapy offers a space to understand your emotional triggers, strengthen your self-trust, and build the kind of relationships you actually want.
✨ Curious about working together? Give us a call or send us a text to schedule a consultation or learn more.
Let’s untangle the chaos of dating—together.